writing

I love the three-part punch of July, August, and September. A lot of changes happen organically around us due to the sheer chaos of warm weather, loose schedules, and everyone’s desire to slam their laptops shut and run away to Greece.

That’s precisely what I did after the three most exciting days on set, shooting my new film They at the end of June. Was it happy or scary excited? I would say “Ha-scary”. If you’ve been following my Instagram broadcast channel, you know I’ve been promising an update on this several times now. I never do get to it because it feels like trying to put into words a rollercoaster of emotions that moves way too fast for you to realize if you love it or your stomach feels sick.

But let’s give it a shot.

On day 1/3, the plan was to start with sunny exterior shots of the main character strolling through Sofia’s streets. But when we woke up it was pouring rain. A lot was going on on set, but most of my mind was preoccupied with worrying about how I didn’t want his hair to be frizzy on camera.

The rest of the day went smoothly, and I started to relax. There’s something curious about creative work — it never gets easier. You think you will feel more confident after being on stage a hundred times or directing multiple movies. But there’s always that doubt, the fear that this time, people will realize that you don’t have it all figured out. Classic impostor syndrome.

Day 2/3 started with me walking to set, screaming internally to Charli XCX’s Sympathy is a knife, helping me shake off some of the adrenaline of shooting a film that I’ve been mentally preparing for three years. To make things extra exciting, parallel to the film I was handling the casting process for another project starting on the next day.

On our set, we had secured a dream location for some key scenes. Without spoiling too much about They, I’m talking about iconic interiors that were crucial to the story. It was a packed day, coordinating the blocking of our lead actors and lots of extras to create a busy, bustling, bubbling setting. Some of my favorite moments on set are when I have to organize lots of bodies in space, giving everyone counts and directions so that when the camera rolls, everyone falls into place and it looks completely organic. Organized chaos is one of those beautiful contradictions that make both film and life that much more thrilling.

Day 3/3 took us to a real cemetery, which came with its own challenges that I will save for another day. It was another tight day, but we had managed to plan the most emotional scene for the last hours on set, which was pure magic. To sweeten the deal, I knew that after wrapping up production I would be running away to Greece myself.

At my best on set, I found time to listen to the input and feedback from the crew. You can get a lot of information not just from the content of what people are saying to you, but the tone and the body language behind the information in their words. Someone’s excitement over a new idea would pull me in and make me wonder how to add it to an already full day. At other times, if I felt someone come to me with a note coming from a place of fear, I’d consider the stress in their voice, and feel it’s my turn to gently nudge them to get past the fear and into excitement.

Filmmaking, like any creative pursuit, is incredibly collaborative, sometimes beyond my comfort zone. I enjoy the creative symbiosis between me and others but it can be a delicate dance, where many factors can conspire to steer you away from your vision. When it happens, you learn to move through the stress without focusing on the stressors. And at the end, the film you make is never the one you had in your head, and that is only a good thing.

When you pull off any film, you feel like a rockstar.